Have you ever looked forward to something you didn’t look forward to? Wha? Huh? You probably think that’s a little sadistic, like those catholic guys during Easter who flail their backs or crucify themselves trying to somehow identify with Christ. Well, every year for the past three I’ve gone on an extended fast and each year I’ve come away with some significant revelations or personal breakthrough in life and the life of others. Every year until I die or physically can’t do it anymore or Jesus comes back, God told me I will be fasting January 1st until 21st or whenever I’m supposed to stop. It will clearly be a food fast with other significant aspects of denying oneself. (Entertainment, Sex, Sports, Books and even friends) I’m hoping next to spend some time in a monastery in meditation and silence.
Three years ago, I went 29 days without knowing why, other than God spoke. In the end it was many reasons. My friend Leann got lost in Mexico, possibly dead but of course we found her but I needed strength for that in a very special way. God released new authority in my life; he prepared me for some very difficult relational issues with close friends and was preparing my heart for planting a church.
Last year I was getting ready to plant a church, still working at Lewistown church and running a campus ministry. God thrust me into a position I’d never been before with responsibilities that superseded my abilities and I was just plain scared silly. There were so many areas I needed to trust in God in for the first time and I felt like a little kid holding on to the leg of his daddy saying “what’s that daddy, I’m scared ”. By his grace I learned to lead make mistakes, lead make mistakes and keep leading and get a church off the ground. I saw my need for greater strength in my relationships with those who have been walking with me for years and also knew I needed some new ones.
This year was all about vision personally, relationally and in the ministry. The main area God has been revealing himself to me is keeping Jesus center in everything I do. My favorite text is Heb12:2 “Fix your eyes on Jesus the author and perfecter of your faith” which can be very relative for a guy like me who lives on the edge and has a tendency to walk in his own strength. This time it’s been more about who Jesus is to me and experiencing his love with no strings attached. You may think “well Jorn that’s the way it supposed to be” but I can tell you being a pastor and carrying people in your hearts, it’s easy to cross the line about why we need Jesus and never get back. This month I will be laying out our one year and five year vision for Discovery Road and have felt like I’ve gotten more direction to be a visionary leader for others. Lastly are my own person goals for the year. They are as follows:
1. Have at least one consistent friendship with a person who doesn’t know Jesus.
2. Be involved in one area of my community that has nothing to do with church or religion.
3. Invest in my leaders relationally not just because of ministry.
4. Stay healthy.
Along the way each fast it has been wonderfully refreshing and yet more difficult because of the spiritual pressure of the enemy. My body has had to face a new challenge each year from kidney stones to bladder and kidney infections. I know there is a great battle going on and Jesus said only with fasting and prayer will you be able to deal with certain battles. Sometimes my daddy’s says “son let go of the pant leg and face what’s coming”
